This evening I feel weird. It’s been nearly two weeks since I stopped being seen, with the occasional meet and greet and one off Instagram pictures of my face. (In all honesty though, those are old photos and I look completely different now.)
It feels very weird. Time as a whole still moves extremely slow for me and the past two weeks have felt like forever because now I have the added knowledge that no-one anywhere knows where I’ve been, what I’m thinking or what I’m doing. A self-induced act of forceful-loneliness if you will.
It’s been good though. Apart from the one off messages of “Sid, I miss you.” It’s been very quiet. So much so, I believe most people have already forgotten me. Which is even weirder because over the past two years I’ve learnt something about myself: I don’t really care about relationships or love. I just want to be adored and worshipped unconditionally.
So being away from all this and forcing an absolute halt on my exposure has been a somewhat self-destructive play on my part. It’s all self-induced.
So where does it go from here?
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